What's the difference between me and you?

Many years ago I went through a brief stage of denial; I tried to convince myself that I was "Bi". Looking back, I can't help but laugh at myself -- what a fool! But hey, I'm only human.

I've always wondered what it was like to be a straight guy. You know... to look at a naked picture of a girl and get an erection. If I could be a heterosexual guy (preferably a jock -- to further stereotype myself) for just one day, I'd flirt with a guy (who I think is gay but in the "closet") and torment him. I'd let him buy me drinks, pay for the movie tickets, pay for dinner. And just when he thinks I'll f*ck him, I'd be all like "Ew, bro, what the hell you doing?! Get your hand off of my crotch! Dude I'm not gay, I'm straight". I'd then leave in a hurry, making sure to flex my body as I walk away.

And...

It's time to wake up! Snap back to reality! Back to being a gay guy living in a world that doesn't (generally speaking) accept homosexuality. It'd be awesome if I woke up one day, took a step outside, and all the guys (and girls) that are gay/lesbian have a special name tag. Something that is preferably easily identifiable; for example, a tag on the arm which reads "My name is Jeff -- I am gay!" (pink coloring). This would make my life so much easier; no need to activate my gaydar (which has been malfunctioning for the last 5-6 years); no need to throw myself onto drunk straight guys; no need to act like I'm interested in "hot chicks" around my straight friends. I could come "out" without the fear of coming "out" and still remaining single. I like to fool myself into thinking that the only reason I'm single is because I'm a gay guy that does not go to gay clubs, pubs or any of that fancy gay networking things. Imagine if I come out and I go to gay clubs, pubs, and those fancy networking things -- and I REMAIN single. My ego would be crushed.

I must say that the worst type of heterosexuals whom I have met are the ones that support the most outrageous things in this world but treat homosexually like the plague. They would act extremely "PC"; "Oh! I'm so glad Obama won, it shows that America is really progressing!" Then when the Ellen Degeneres show comes on, the same "PC" heterosexuals say something so stupid which consequently make them look like dumb-asses: "You know, I think one of the reason Ellen is so popular is because she's a lesbian". Yeah... that's it. I'm sure it has nothing to do with her being a hard worker or that she perservered in an industry that is, in my opinion, still currently homophobic. I'm sure Ellen is popular only because she likes to eat pussy.

I look at these homophobes and I think to myself: our genes are so similar (99.9% or something), and we both are so privileged (running water, shelter, two arms, two feet), so what the hell went wrong? What makes you so much better than me? What exactly is the difference between me and you?

I can't imagine myself waking up one day, thinking "Today is the day. Today is the day that I will stop talking to all of my straight friends. Today I'm going to be a heterophobe. Screw those straight couples, I'm going to act all disgusted when I see a guy and a girl hold hands".

I'm a firm believer in relativity; what may be relatively important to me may not be relatively important to you. Everyone, at the end of the day, can have their own opinions and beliefs. But this one thing is so hard for me to grasp. This idea that gay people chose to be gay. Is it so hard to understand that we were born this way? A pastor once told me that being gay is the devil's doing. I won't even get into that.